An Introduction
Hi, I'm Ljubica!
My name means love. And everything I write here is my attempt to live up to it — at home, and at work, as The Kind Coder.
I believe the way we treat people reflects how we see them as well as ourselves. That makes kindness one of the most important practices I know. Softness and weakness and niceness are different concepts entirely and something I’ll cover in the future, but for now, let's talk about what kindness actually looks like.
To me, kindness is the ability to extend grace and compassion, whether that's to yourself or to someone else.
Speaking with kindness might look like pausing the flow of a conversation to check in on the quiet ones in the group; reminding them that their presence matters, even when they're not taking up space.
Moving with kindness looks like holding the door open a beat longer for a big group. It looks like grabbing extra napkins for your table, or ordering a cake pop for someone who only got a drink. Take it a step further: ask the barista what their favorite drink is, and tip them enough to get it on their break. Then wish them a good, quiet one because retail is hard on the mind and body.
Kindness shows up in the way you speak to someone, what you do for them without being asked, and how you think about them when you're apart. And it isn't easy. Especially with tumultuous relationships or strangers, frustration gets the better of me regularly. I have to pause and ask myself: do I want to use my brain for hateful thoughts right now? Do I need to stomp around?
Sometimes the answer is a resounding yes — and I let myself feel it. Then, when the big feelings have had their moment, I sit back down and ask again: what do I actually need right now? How can I be kinder to myself so I have kindness left to give? It takes practice. But I've found a level of peace and self-trust that feels new and worth protecting. I love living that way.
That same practice is what I bring to my work as a Senior Software Engineer. My team looks to me for answers to complex questions, for help navigating competing priorities, and for strong code both written and reviewed. Staying kind through all of that isn't an accident. It's a skill, and it's a learnable one.
Welcome to a blog about code, technology, and philosophy. I'll be writing through it all — practical posts, digital versions of workshops I've run, and a lot of honest reflection on what it means to build with care. I'll be your guide.
A pair of questions to start us off:
How have you been kind today? To yourself counts double!
How do you build kindness into your routine?
See you in the next one!